Today I meditated outside. I live in a duplex apartment and have a small balcony where I grow plants, feed the crows and used to keep chickens. The chickens I rescued were always very destructive towards my plants, I don’t know if that’s a response to the stressful conditions they were bred in, or ifContinue reading “Autumn”
Tag Archives: awareness
Cause and Effect
I have not been able to write much in the last few days. The reason being that I lack the clarity to use discrete objects like words to describe my present experiences. After some initial discoveries and removal of some obvious blocks I have tumbled into a space where I am entirely unsure. I haveContinue reading “Cause and Effect”
——-
My father severely dislikes women. I have grown up bearing the brunt of this. Yesterday after many days I felt a relentless pain stemming from an incident related to this. I have of course forgiven and mostly forgotten, but every now and then, when I least expect it, I am pole vaulted into the past.Continue reading “——-“
Capybara
Aw man, the inertia. It just won’t let go. So used to thinking, over thinking, only thinking, you have to be Constantly aware, paying attention, you start to get relaxed (the bad sort of relaxed) and you’re back in that bogus framework. Cause you’ve lived with it and identified with it for So long. AndContinue reading “Capybara”
Not
Empathy is not the same as loving kindness. I liked that I was an over sensitive being, that I could understand how those around me were feeling, it helped me in my art and my awareness. However over time it started to cripple me. Affective empathy. Always picking up and feeling what was not mine.Continue reading “Not”
Fall
I tried something different today, I cannot be bound within regime for too long, I need to find my own ways of doing things. I sat on my mat, listening to some very simple marimba based ‘meditation music’ (Yes I have very strong opinions on this particular category of music, most of it is eitherContinue reading “Fall”
Stages
For me there are roughly three stages of learning a piece. I mean a piece of music written by someone else, not something I have composed (that is another chapter). The first stage is obviously figuring out the notes and where they belong, that is, the time. The second stage, and this is probably theContinue reading “Stages”
Teach Me
My piano teacher was fond of saying, “Oh, look at him, he thinks he’s arrived.” He was referring to another pianist of course and you must forgive him for not including the hers, he was an old man, and a Goan, and could not bother himself with being correct. For whatever I am today asContinue reading “Teach Me”
Self Portrait by David Whyte
Rakhi
I meant to write this yesterday, but through all the animal activist duties I could not catch the appropriate frame of mind. Yesterday was Rakhi, it’s an Indian festival that celebrates the love between a brother and a sister. I do not have the ability to articulate what he means to me. Sometimes people lookContinue reading “Rakhi”
