There is a new stillness in the room I have been practising meditation in, I feel it as soon as I enter from the noise outside, it suddenly becomes quieter. After practising in a disciplined way, every single day, for the last 45 days or so, gradually increasing duration and intensity, I have had my first understanding of what it means to “observe the breath as soon as it arises”, as soon as it arises, where it is created, where it is born. People around me are so negative, most of them, I say meditate, they say meditation is not the answer, I say try, they try it once or twice, they say meditation is not the answer, I say try, they say you don’t know how we feel, what we’ve been through, I stop saying and retreat into my own meditation. Learning a music instrument has made me very patient and open to this practice of mindfulness, it has taken years to understand the sheer simplicity of how things work, when I compare that to the amount of time and energy I have invested in meditation, it is a fraction so small, I can barely see it. So how do I expect a return, a quick fix, the work must be done, but how does one communicate green to a blind man.
I will work on Tool’s ‘Parabol’ today, I did a very clumsy but very sincere version of it many years ago, I will try to refine that.